Daily Archives: July 28, 2021

Being Alone, Solace, and Loneliness

Ever been alone?  Ever sought solace?  Ever experience loneliness?  I’m sure most reading this have done all three at one time or another.   When I was growing up on the farm I spent a lot of my time alone. Once in a while I got to have a girlfriend over and we had relations visit quite often so I wasn’t alone all the time.  I would go outside in the morning and not come in until dinner at noon and then, unless I had chores to do, back outside again until Supper.  I didn’t want to be inside.  In  fact, one time I came in the house in the afternoon and felt kind of strange because I had never been inside at that time of day.   My daddy never came inside except to eat as his work was outside on the farm.  A lot of the time I was with him or in the barn shooting baskets or playing with some young animal.  My older brothers were out doing their own thing and my sister was married. I had a younger brother and I must have played with him sometimes, but I really don’t remember.  We did shell peas together on the front porch and one time we were shelling the peas and throwing the pea pods all over the porch floor, thinking it was funny at the time, when our pastor came to visit. Mother came to the door and saw what we had done and she was not one bit happy about it. She kept silent until the pastor left and then we got it!  And we had to clean up all those pea pods.

I have sought solace at times when I was sad or upset about something. Going off alone and praying always has helped me.  I  go outside even now and sit on a swing and pray and talk to God.  Jesus often went off alone from the disciples to speak to His Father.  If it was good enough for him, it’s good enough for me.  Try it sometime when you need to have some peace.

Loneliness is a whole other thing. Ever felt alone in a crowd?  I have when I didn’t know anyone.   It’s tough to feel alone in those circumstances.   Some people just cannot stand being alone. I know a few of them.   They need people around them all the time. I think my alone time growing up prepared me for my alone times now that I’m adult. Ever hear someone say they are their own best company?  Sometimes that is how I feel.  I feel very comfortable by myself and I’m never bored. I usually agree with myself and we have really intelligent conversations!   I love to read, sew and knit and all those things are pretty much done alone. It’s not that I don’t like to be around people because I do.  When My children were growing up, there were times I would wish I had some alone time to read.  I did most of my reading right before bed and it’s become a habit for me.   Unfortunately, I usually fall asleep before I read very far.  So I’m trying to read more during the day.  I’ve been trying to catch up reading all my Reader’s Digests I have received in the mail.

My mother got the Reader’s Digest years ago and I would read them cover to cover.  I kept taking it through the years after I was married. They have so many interesting stories and articles and I try to read all of one before I throw it away.  But I got a backlog of them and am playing catch up.   Do you take the Reader’s Digest?   It’s one of my favorite magazines.  Farmhouse Style and Yankee Magazine are two others I enjoy.  But why do I take magazines when I have thousands of books waiting to be read?

Back to being alone.  I really don’t mind being alone.  I have so many things running around in my mind that I want to do and I already have so many projects I am working on.  And even if I didn’t, I have a good imagination that keeps me occupied.   When I was a girl, I dreamed of being an author. I would walk around and tell the story of my life in my mind describing my movements and what I was thinking.   I also had a horse story with the same characters I would think about. It was an ongoing story for years and I don’t know when I stopped thinking about it. Probably when I got my own horse.  I’m thinking this blog will come as close to writing a book I will get.

What do you do when you are alone or suffer loneliness?  Where do you seek solace?   Everyone handles being alone differently and there really isn’t a right answer.   I do not like to shop alone or go to the doctor alone even though I do.  There are some things I don’t like doing alone.  I find myself wishing I still had my mother to take me to the doctor or dentist because I really don’t like to go to either one by myself.   Funny, because it was my daddy who always took me to the doctor and he took me to my one and only dentist’s visit when I needed a tooth pulled and the dentist was so mean, my daddy gave him a dressing down and told him he would never bring any of his children to him.   I didn’t go to a dentist again until I started taking my children and then I had my teeth checked.  One time I stepped on a rusty nail and my daddy took me to our old country doctor and all he and my father talked about was people getting lockjaw(tetanus) and dying from it because they had not had a tetanus shot. Scared me to death!!  So I was glad to get a tetanus shot and I still ask for them now every ten years or so since I work so much outside.  I have heard of people getting tetanus from digging in the ground.

As usual I have strayed far from my original essay.  Alone, loneliness and solace.  People suffer every one of these in their lives. It’s how you handle them that matters.  Hope no one feels alone tonight or suffers loneliness. Bye.